


Selfish

by brandflakeeee



Category: Sanctuary (TV)
Genre: Gen, just a little thing, theres teslen if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-08
Updated: 2018-02-08
Packaged: 2019-03-15 10:39:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13611639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brandflakeeee/pseuds/brandflakeeee
Summary: Helen reflects as she finishes work for the day.  Post S4.





	Selfish

Selfish, she thinks. Selfish, reckless, and downright dangerous.

But the universe has taken so much from her, and Helen will be damned if she lets that slide. 

The words on the report she's holding in front of her swim until she realises she's read the same passage three times. Brows knitting neatly together, she adds it to the top of a pile within reach for first thing in the morning. She replaces it in her hand by grabbing her tepid cup of tea, making a face at it's chill.

A soft sigh and she glances down at the head in her lap. She smiles, her free hand still carding gently through her daughter's fringe. For her part, Ashley does not stir and continues snoozing with her head followed by Helen's lap.

There had been no body before, like the others, because it was here. Alive. Protected.

She had risked timeline backlash, but she would not make the same mistake twice. Plucking Ash from just the right moment, using newfound technology to drag her mind back into reality. A difficult journey, one both were still adjusting to.

Worth it. Helen's dreams of her Sanctuary had always involved Ashley.

Quiet chatter has her looking up to catch Nikola in the doorway, arguing with her father. She catches Nikola's gaze and smiles, which in turn catches Gregory's attention. 

She admits her success with Ashley had made her second attempt all the more confident, bolder, brazen.

She doesn't regret it. Not for a moment.

In a few moments Ashley will wake, rub sleep off her face, and the four will stumble down to join the others for dinner. For now there's a soft peace that lasts in the room, silence only punctured by the chiming of a clock on her desk. Dinner will be loud, there will be laughter, tell of everyone's individual days, and she will watch on with a genuine but worn smile and clutching Nikola's hand beneath the table. 

Perhaps she's not selfish at all, she considers. She's deserved this. The universe owes her this much peace. This small shape of happiness that envelops their new lives. She's carved space for this shape all her own among the tragedy, among the loss over the course of five lifetimes. It had taken some time to carve it, to whittle it out, and to slot in the missing pieces.

This is the only pay she asks for her attempts to do good in the world.

No, she decides. Not selfish at all.


End file.
